Made my day

❝When I pretend to be strong, no one sees my hidden tears except Allah. When I’m sad and need a shoulder to cry on, no one supports me but Allah. Pleasing a human is very difficult, pleasing Allah is the easiest. People sometimes punish me for mistakes I have not done, Allah ignores and excuses the ones that I did. This is Allah, The Greatest, The Most Almighty, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful, and all praise belongs to Him.❞— Dr Tariq Ramadan



Sabar sabar sabarrr. May Allah ease :')

Ahad

I wasn't so happy last week. And like other normal and ungrateful humans, I turn to Him. But I don't think anyone noticed that I was unhappy because in hospital, I'd be too busy to show my emotions. I like it when I'm in hospital, I don't want to go back to my house, back to my room where I'd be alone and sad haha. 

Most of the people in the hospital are sadder than me. There was one patient who already got aborted twice had to deliver her baby at 28th week. When people get recurrent abortions, the next pregnancy will be a precious one (according to the doctors) so whatever happens they will try to save the baby. Oh ya, I'm in OBG (in Malaysia it is OnG) posting now so most of my patients are pregnant ladies. Anyway, the normal period of pregnancy is between 37-42 weeks. By 28th, baby is barely viable (survive in the outside world) and hers was only 1kg! Haip Toby lagi berat berganda-ganda. So kesian because it's her first baby and the baby got transferred to a better hospital (for babies), she didn't even get the chance to feed it. See, I'm not as sad as compared to her. 

Another patient, an old lady who got pregnant for 12 times but only two of her children survive. She look so old but I don't think she's over 60 yet and she can't speak anything but Telegu. Telegu is very much a traditional language, usually only old and kampung people would use it. She got admitted because she has genital prolapse as in the whole uterus is coming out of her vagina. After three years she finally came to the hospital because now she's getting problem passing urine and all. She's been here for almost a week so every time I come to see her all I can say is "Amma! Good? (tunjuk ibu jari)" and pat her at the back. She's a lot sadder than me. How can I even say that I'm sad?

Let's just be happy and appreciate life. They say life is too short. It is! It's already March! That leaves me another 9 months then I'll be 22! I feel so old and wrinkly. And forgetful. I forget about a lot of things. I forgot how did I celebrate my birthday the last time? How can I forget? Meh.

Just be kind to everyone, but don't expect people to do the same in return. Humans are complicated like that. Just be kind for the sake of Allah because He loves all kind of kindness :)

Assalamualaikum.

Two am

I blame the society. They want us to do things according to what's right for them. For example, wedding. Why can't people just get married by akad nikah and do some walimah instead of all those duit hantaran, all those dulang berbalas dulang whatever. So troublesome and waste of money. Better save up for a proper house and proper meals or whatever, rather than a grand marriage just for the sake of "it look nice in the picture".


There.


It feels so good to put the blame on others.


Although deep down inside I know I'm the one to be blamed.

Senseless

Belum pernah aku berurusan dengan sesuatu yang lebih sulit daripada jiwaku sendiri, yang kadang-kadang membantu aku dan kadang-kadang menentangku  - Imam Al-Ghazali.



Hai jiwa, I'm too old for this. 

Dua minggu

Assalamualaikum.

Last weekend I went to a program but no, I won't update about it haha because it was a lazy weekend, I barely take any photos and well, I'm just lazy :p Anyway, while I was there (I don't even know the name of the place?!) I bought a book; "Jalan cinta para pejuang" by Salim A. Fillah. I just finished reading 1-2 chapters but I fall in love with the book already. Tho I barely understand Indonesian language but the way he describes about love, is really beautiful.

I'll try to finish it in two weeks time (ya, I got one more exam coming in two weeks) and if I'm rajin enough I'll share some things. 

Google image.

I had a rough week. Sigh. But some comforting words keep me going, Alhamdulillah. Here, hopefully everyone's reading this would be as strong as I am hihi ;)

Your life is nothing more than a love story. Between you and God. Nothing more. Every person, every experience, every gift, every loss, every pain is sent to your path for one reason and one reason only: to bring you back to Him - Yasmin Mogahed

Ok bye.