FEVER

i got fever for almost 5 days now. 5 days, lama tu.. for something as common as fever kan? lama sebab i just take paracetamol (Panadol) two times a day and other traditional methods like lap badan guna kain basah, makan buah-buahan etc etc. on the second or third day i had sore throat. very SORE sore throat. susah nak telan makanan/minuman tu satu hal, yang paling tak best bila sujud rasa sangat sakit. i don't know why. rasa macam there's huge something trying to get out of my throat *over* oh, tambah dengan sakit kepala kot.

i must admit that since i came to India, i am very vulnerable to any kind of disease. seriously man, baru dua tahun kat sini eh dah berapa kali jumpa doctor eh demam lagi eh bosannya kau sikit-sikit sakit T_T tapi selama ni tak pernah la demam sampai 5 hari baru pergi jumpa doctor mintak antibiotic. i never had such sore throat. sedih..

sedih sebab usually when i'm sick i'll call Umi and nangiiiiiss haha yeah, i used to be that cengeng. but Abah always tell me jangan buat Umi risau, and Umi has hypertension too. so this time around i'm so cool i just say hai Mom i'm sick, eh don't worry i've taken some medicine i'll be fine bye. lepas bye terus nangis sorang-sorang, boleh tak? *foreveralone*

at one point in your life, you become so matured you don't want to make your parents worry anymore :p

my friends keep asking me are you really sick, you don't look sick at all. i was like, "do i have to cry in front of you guys to prove that i really am sick?" come on man, i used to be that cengeng girl. now i prefer not to cry in front of anyone *except Umi, Abah, Toby and encik best friend*.

when i'm sick, i am very vulnerable ALONE. that's why i prefer to go to school and laugh at something funny, crack my head on the lectures and forget the pain for some time. poyos sikit, tak ada la sakit mana tapi i'm bad at handling pain. every night for 4 consecutive days i was so worried i might die and nobody would notice *drama* eh tapi serius, anyone can die anytime right? then i got worried about my amal and what should i answer Allah when He ask me anything T_T

why i don't look sick? bila nampak sakit, people sympathize. then? that's all. come on, everyone is busy mana ada masa nak sympathize for 5 days. but it's really nice of you guys to ask me whether i'm fine, really appreciate it :") i don't want people's attention. because it's only for one second. but Allah's not. so i prefer to look sick when i'm alone. or with Toby *Umi and Abah don't count because i don't want them to worry*. or with encik best friend.

btw, i missed a lot of things this week. i have loads of homework, i even flunked my presentation and i missed a lot of usrahs too. but i learned a lot of things too. and i get to know some people better. Allah, please i need my good health back. i'm sorry i don't appreciate it when i have it with me now i learned my lesson T_T

p/s : semua orang sangat baik :")